Fear

Abusive Relationships: Closer than you think

Posted on by Betsy Nuismer
Abusive Relationships: Closer than you think Abuse is a word that carries a lot of weight. When I think of abuse, I think of a little puppy who was left in a kennel for too long without food and water and looks sick with scurvy. When I think of abuse, I think of a little child who was sexually assaulted. Abuse does look like those things, but it looks a lot more familiar too. The definition of abuse is “any unwanted action taken against another person.” ...

I Hate Fake people!

Posted on by Betsy Nuismer
I Hate Fake people! I’ve heard the phrase “I hate fake people” a lot, and yes, I’ve said it a lot. Fake people are the worst! You know the type: those people who are always spewing out lies and constantly talking about themselves, presenting themselves as something other than who they really are. We can see right through them, and I get this icky feeling that grows in my stomach when I’m around them. Weather I like it or not, I have been this type ...

Why Secondary Trauma Is A Big Deal

Posted on by Betsy Nuismer
Why Secondary Trauma Is A Big Deal Grief is an all-encompassing word. It is an experience of loss. This loss can range from the death of a loved one, all the way to the death of an idea, or a hope. It is all loss. The kind of loss I want to talk about is called secondary trauma. Trauma is anything that we experience as life-altering or overwhelming. It can be something as “small” as finding out Santa Clause is not real (which could include finding out ...

Mourning the Loss of What Could Have Been

Posted on by Betsy Nuismer
Mourning the Loss of What Could Have Been Something didn’t happen to you. It could have been a mother’s warm embrace that never happened because she was too busy drinking. A marriage that didn’t have a “happily ever after” because it is now ending. A child that was still born instead of being vibrant and healthy. A friend that was not there for you when you needed them the most, leaving you without support. You lost something, and your hopes and dreams about what could have been are now ...

The Dow Jones is Falling, The Stock Market is Faltering, The World Might End…What Do I Do?

Posted on by Scott Nuismer
The Dow Jones is Falling, The Stock Market is Faltering, The World Might End…What Do I Do? The Fear I must admit that when the stock market fell through the floor last week and has continued to falter, I was seriously concerned about my retirement funds and had some anxiety at the thought of what our monthly statement would say when it came in the mail. I know I’m not alone here. One look at the media attention given to the issue is evidence enough that the hemorrhaging market is putting hoards of people on edge about what the ...

A Young Man’s Letter to his Retirement Plan

Posted on by Scott Nuismer
A Young Man’s Letter to his Retirement Plan Dear Retirement Plan, I need you. I hate you. You tell me all these wonderful promises about how you will be there for me when my body is overrun by time and wrinkles. You tell me that it’s okay for my back to be bent beyond its ability to work because someday you will support me. You say that, work or not, someday I will be safe and warm, no matter what. For all this, I am tempted to love you and ...

Am I Enough? The Desperate Search for Value in both Men and Women

Posted on by Scott Nuismer
Am I Enough? The Desperate Search for Value in both Men and Women “You can be the most beautiful person in the world and everybody sees light and rainbows when they look at you, but if you yourself don’t know it, all of that doesn’t even matter.” – C. Joybell C. “You think because he doesn’t love you that you are worthless. You think that because he doesn’t want you anymore that he is right — that his judgment and opinion of you are correct. If he throws you out, then you are garbage. ...

The Hurricane of Adolescence

Posted on by Scott Nuismer
The Hurricane of Adolescence Below is part of a chapter out of the book I am currently working on. I think we can all relate. Enjoy!   Adolescence can be seen like a massive hurricane (and for many of us, it was). This hurricane consists of two major tasks, 1) surviving the raging waters of new hormones and emotions, and 2) withstanding the screaming winds of our first taste of autonomy – independence and figuring out where we fit in the pecking order. If we were ...