Taking care of myself, or as us therapists like to call it, Self-Care, can seem selfish to many, but is it really? Sometimes people will say, “I just need a break from life” or “I’ve had a really hard day” to excuse negative behavior like a spending spree, eating junk food, or treating loved ones poorly. This is not self-care. This is self-sabotage. It may feel good in the moment, but in the long run, it is hurtful to you ...
How to: Self-care
Taking care of myself, or as us therapists like to call it, Self-Care, can seem selfish to many, but is it really? Sometimes people will say, “I just need a break from life” or “I’ve had a really hard day” to excuse negative behavior like a spending spree, eating junk food, or treating loved ones poorly. This is not self-care. This is self-sabotage. It may feel good in the moment, but in the long run, it is hurtful to you ...
Educate Yourself. If you suspect a family member or friend has a mental illness or they told you they were diagnosed, learn as much as you can about the illness. Learn what causes it, for example, in depression serotonin levels are low, do you know what that means and how serotonin works in the brain? If not, look it up! Just by being there and loving them is a major help, and the first step is to know what their diagnosis ...
This is a follow up to my blog about Domestic Violence. Read that, know the signs, then understand what you can do to help by reading below.
Abuse is everywhere. One in every three women are abused sexually and that is a staggering number considering how the addition of statistics for physical and verbal forms of abuse would only increase that number. This is not a game and it’s not something to joke about. Sexual abuse doesn’t happen because they wore ...
By far the most critical issue married people say they have when they come to my office in Colorado Springs for help is, “we don’t know how to communicate.” Although communication is a key factor in marriage, it typically is not the biggest issue. After a few sessions, we will usually discover that the issue lies much deeper, and the married couple finds themselves dealing with a bigger problem than they anticipated. Dealing with these foundational issues is the most ...
The first and very important aspect of expressing feelings, explained in detail in THIS BLOG, is how to observe another without putting your own evaluations on it. One cannot communicate effectively without first listening to the others’ perspective. Once the other person feels understood, you will notice the intensity of emotion both in you and in them will be much less.
The second part to successful communication is expressing your own feelings. This one can be difficult. I used to only ...
Once I was riding in the car with a friend who took my wife and I to see an event. The event went well and we all had a fine time, but something interesting happened on the way home. Our friend who, about 10 minutes earlier was complaining that someone was driving too close behind her, was driving too close behind someone else. Traffic on the three lane highway was minimal at that point in the trip and she could ...
The Fear
I must admit that when the stock market fell through the floor last week and has continued to falter, I was seriously concerned about my retirement funds and had some anxiety at the thought of what our monthly statement would say when it came in the mail. I know I’m not alone here. One look at the media attention given to the issue is evidence enough that the hemorrhaging market is putting hoards of people on edge about what the ...
